"The words of his mouth were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart; his words were softer than oil, yet they were drawn swords." Psalm 55:21 NKJV
Sadly at times, we will come up against people who are two-faced; we all meet them. They are people who listen to your closely-guarded secrets or concerns and then go away talking about them to others that they meet. Amazingly, it can be in the guise of praying, 'Could I just pray for......... I'm concerned because....' They may then go on to tell your story but with greater exaggeration.
A two-faced person can be attention seeking and manipulative, knowing how to play with a person's mind and feelings. David came up against this realising the treachery of his friends. Yet it's interesting to note that, even though they were dishonourable to him, David remained honourable to them and didn't name them. And this is the difference.
There are times when we must challenge such behaviour, gossiping is a dangerous tactic, it spreads like wildfire. However, there is never a time when we should be accusatory towards a person. The devil is the one who accuses; but if such a time is necessary, confrontation may be the only way.
If confrontation is the only way to try and resolve this problem, it would be helpful to ensure that the person confronted will not gossip and falsely accuse you about this; one has to be careful. It may be necessary to have a witness at the confrontation - someone who is extremely trustworthy, as this may alleviate any twisting of the conversation that takes place.
It would be easy to just ignore what has happened, being careful to avoid the person in the future. However, this could mean that the person may go to others repeating what they did to you and it could really get out of control. Love must over-rule every action that is taken; it must be handled the way Jesus would do it. The thing to ask yourself is, would he allow two-faced gossiping to be rampant in His church. The answer is no. Therefore, a plan of action will need to be put into place. This may include running it by the pastor, but it would need to be done properly, otherwise, you could end up on a gossiping charge.
At the end of the day, we have to come to the conclusion that, as human beings, we all have our sinful ways and there are occasions when we may be in error ourselves. No one likes discipline, but it is necessary if the church is to be victorious. Remember the devil is always ready to attack. If he sees a way in, he'll take it. So, it's wise to make sure that things are snuffed out before they ruin all the fruit.
Copyriight 2020 Grahame Howard
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