James 1:19-20. NKJV
Think back to a recent time, when you had a 'few words' with your spouse, family member, friend or even someone in the street, or from the inside of your car. How did you react? Was it a heated conversation, one in which, words were spoken that you now regret?
The things we say can be like a tranquil lake - peaceful waters, or they can be like a tempest - raging waters. It is controlled by the way we react to given situations. A quick glance at a very basic Cognitive Behavioural Therapy chart, may give a useful example. A Daily Record of Automatic thoughts goes like this.
SITUATION - EMOTION - AUTOMATIC THOUGHT - RATIONAL RESPONSE - OUTCOME.
We have a situation and this may causes an emotion. This may be anger, fear, suspicion etc. An automatic thought can then pop into our mind and this may not be obvious at the time. This thought however, can lead us to the response, which may be negative, the outcome can then be a major incident. For example:
SITUATION Someone pushes against you in the street that knocks you off balance
EMOTION The emotion may be anger
AUTOMATIC THOUGHT 'Who does he/she think they are - I'll sort him/her out
RESPONSE Altercation
OUTCOME Fight/argument/arrest and later regret and guilt
If we identify and examine our automatic thought, we may be able to look at the alternative, 'It was only an accident, not intentional'
RATIONAL RESPONSE Apology - peace
This is only a very basic look at CBT but it can be useful in identifying where we went wrong as we play the video back in our mind. We may not be able to do this at the time, but practicing this can help for future events.
It can run in line with the higher way - our text today: 'Be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.' We need to hear or assess the situation quickly i.e. 'What is happening here?' Then zip the lip - watch what comes out of your mouth. If your words are negative and threatening, this can lead to wrath - anger. Once this has happened, we can be compromised in our Christian walk. We let ourselves down big time and our negative words and actions are difficult to airbrush out of the picture we have painted.
Regret and guilt help to drag us down and the devil has a heyday. It is far better to train our minds to be in control of each and every situation.
Copyright 2020 Grahame Howard
dailylifewithjesus@hotmail.com
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