The Marriage

18 'Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.19Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. 20Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord. 21Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.                  Colossians 3:18-21 NKJV

God has ordained marriage and holds us responsible for the marriage vows. For those of us who are married, he has brought us together, joined us as one in Him. He is the ultimate head of our union. He does though, give us certain rules to work by, such as the text above. The wife is to submit to her husband but this doesn't mean she can be treated like a doormat. The husband should love his wife and never bully her or act as a dictator. The wife has input into the marriage and this should be recognised by him . She can be of great value to him with this input. But the main point here is that the husband has the ultimate responsibility for making  decisions, under God, because they will affect the well-being of the family. If a husband places his wife in a situation where he would like her to sin, she does not owe him her submission. She should never be forced to do any such thing like this.

The husband should always act with love towards his wife and children, ensuring that they live in harmony with the Lord. He should always seek the best for her and his children. Jesus is his model. Let's see how Paul puts it in Ephesians 5:

'Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Saviour of the body.  24Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,  26that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,  27that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.  28So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.  29For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church'.  Ephesians 5:18-29  NKJV

Notice verse 25 'Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her'. A husband should be like Jesus, giving himself up for her in all that he does. In return, the wife should recognise her husband as the head of the household, and give him the love and respect that Jesus requires.

If our children are brought up in such a manner, they will learn from this model and do the same. They may need some direction at times but, with children this is normal. But love will win them over.

All the above sounds pretty good as we read it but, it takes all we have to live in such a way. The secret ingredient is having Jesus as the central part of our lives and family. The Equilateral Triangle describes this very well. Imagine a triangle - three point. Jesus is the central point (North). The wife can be bottom point on the left, the husband on the right. As they walk daily with Jesus, they are gradually rising on the triangle towards Jesus.

And this is the way to live in union with each other and Jesus.

If you don't know Jesus or, have fallen away, why not say this prayer right now:

'Lord Jesus, I have sinned and I ask you to forgive me and be my Lord and Saviour. Please come into my heart, fill me with Your Spirit and give me a brand new start today.

In Jesus' Name. Amen'

Copyright 2024 Grahame Howard.                                

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