"We do not know what to do, but we look to You" 2 Chronicles 20:12 CSB
As a Christian, we have certain values and expectations and when anything comes along to try and change this, we need some help and advice. Take for example, the son or daughter who tells his Christian parents that they are gay. This can certainly knock the wind out of their sails, an unexpected disclosure that has the ability to change everything the family believe in.
How can this work in a Christian family. One option is to ask them to leave the home if they want to live this way. But this is not the way Jesus would want a parent to handle the situation. It is happening all over the world where young people are 'coming out' or in some families, wanting to have a sex change. The latter is quite a drastic decision and one that requires some serious discussion and possibly counselling to check that this is what they want to do.
Assuming that this could be happening to you, let's look at the 'Coming out' area firstly. One thing a parent must do is realise that this is about the young person, not how it will affect the parent or the 'What will people think' scenario. Yes, it will conflict against the Christian values the family hold but, initially is there any reason to let anyone else know? It's about you and yours, not about what do they think. One thing though, it cannot be swept under the carpet because, sooner or later it will become public. Therefore, the first port of call is Jesus. What does He suggest? We know what His word says about homosexuality but, what is He saying to you? One thing He won't do is point the finger of judgement, it is what it is and this is the best place to start. He will also not want you to compromise this situation. So one thing you can say to your child is, 'Well, I don't agree with what you are doing but, I will support you through this.' What you are saying is that the situation is not ideal but you will be there for them and love them, no matter what. They need to know this.
Jesus understands these things. It is not your fault, there is no need to take the blame and it is not your child's fault either. One thing we must realise is that God doesn't make mistakes. Your child was not born this way. It comes down to choice. The pressures on young people today is very strong, what with peer pressure, films, the internet and similar, a young person can become drawn into temptation the same way we are. Only one person can change this - the young person themself. You no doubt have brought them up in a Christian home. They know the drill but sometimes they can rebel and do their own thing. This may be temporary or long term. All you can do is pray for them that God will help them realise that living in such a way is against God's law. The world would disagree and have a hey day with these comments but, I'm just passing on what God feels about such a thing as this.
It's the same with gender changes. We're all born one gender - male or female. As I have said, God doesn't make mistakes but the devil will try to confuse young people's minds. Again, all you can do here is show them that it conflicts with your faith but, you will support them. And then, give it to God and pray, pray and pray some more. You can share it with trusted friends but, think before you do. Would the young person want you to do this? It's doubtful.
There is counselling but again, think this through; in this day and age it is an accepted part of life and authorities can come down strong on people who try to protest in this manner. I would suggest, for your child's sake, that you give this to Jesus with all of your worries and cares and ask Him to change things. He is on your side because, He knows what is written in His book. Therefore, He is committed to you.
A final word for parents going through this difficult time. If you have a trusted friend who you know will not gossip about this, then consider asking them to pray for you. But, above all else, know for certain that Jesus knows how you feel and will give you the support you need. It is a time to lean on Him and receive Proverbs 3:5-6 / Psalm 23
Here is a prayer for you:
Lord, show us the way to go with these issues. We believe that Your Word is true and binding so, please help us to find a way through it all and bring Your Shalom Peace into our lives. In Jesus’ name. Amen
If you don't know Jesus or, have fallen away, why not say this prayer right now:Lord Jesus, I have sinned
I ask you to forgive me and be my Lord and Saviour. Please come into my heart, fill me with Your Spirit and give me a brand new start today.
Copyright 2024 Grahame Howard. dailylifewithjesusbygrahamehoward.blogspot.com
If you would like to contact me, grahame.howard@hotmail.co.uk
Member of the National Association of Christian Ministers
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